Are gherkins really evil?

A brief mention of McDonalds, in a previous post, inevitably meant that the, ‘are gherkins evil?’ debate cropped up again (this is one of those veja du* conversations) and needs addressing. So, with tongue firmly in cheek, a theological reflection:
gherk.jpgThe Gherkin: Several Christians question the presence of the gherkin within the Cheeseburger (or indeed without) and venture as far as seeing it as evil, or at least a post-fall food stuff. The gherkin is of course a small (pickled cucumber) and only mentioned once in the Bible [Numbers 11:5] where it is given as an example as one of the things the Israelites miss about being in bondage in Egypt. Theologically ‘Egypt’ is always a picture of the world (the rescue of the Israelites by God being a picture of our own redemption) and of slavery to the world system. Cucumbers and hence gherkins are therefore theologically rooted in ‘The World’ (in the theological not geographical sense). This would be enough to castigate the gherkin to theologically non-acceptable foodstuffs, however adding in Johns words, “Do not love the world or anything in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him” [1 Jon 2:15] then it is clear the gherkin is a non-christian, wordly, forbidden and dangerous vegetable! QED, LOL 🙂
*veja du is the feeling that you’ll probably be there again

7 Replies to “Are gherkins really evil?”

  1. oh, but I thought it didn’t matter what we ate now (Acts 10)… I like gherkins.
    And if Numbers 11 is to be theologically upheld fish, melon, garlic, leeks and onions are all ‘of the world’. The only foods given by God were manna and quail… and there’s not enough of that to go around anymore… Does that mean that *everything* else we eat is ‘of the world’… but then God created cucumbers in the first place…
    Oh I’m confused.

  2. i saw the title of this post and thought you were talking about that funny building in london city!
    incidentally i loving gerkins and that big mac sauce. gherkin haters send them this way

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