It’s a fact, it’s a thing ……

9 million.jpg Katie Melua is definitely cheering up my days at the moment. When I’m listening to the radio and her single comes on, it makes me laugh. There’s something about the opening lyrics:
There are nine million bicycles in Beijing
That’s a fact
It’s a thing ….”

that just induces laughter. I can’t decide whether, as a piece of lyrical writing, it’s brilliant or terrible BUT it does make me laugh 🙂 If you haven’t heard it then you can watch/hear it here.
Anyone else think of some REALLY terrible opening lines to a song? I reckon this could be great fun on a youth residential …. everyone finds and reads out a BAD opening line(s) and also people would have to guess the genre it belongs to (it could then be played if anyone had it on an I-pod with them). But get the ball rolling now with some examples eh ….

(As an aside, the population stats for Beijing are 7.73 million which means that every bod there owns an average of 1.15 bicycles! That would have been interesting for Katie Melua to have woven into the song)

9 Replies to “It’s a fact, it’s a thing ……”

  1. i’ve always liked the opening line- “awop babalola a wop bam boom” not sure about the spelling sorry, not an oppening line but the beggining of a verse and just great lyric writing has to be “if i were a sculpter, but then again no.”

  2. aahhh yes if we are to open it up into lyrics within the song that gives us much more scope.
    I’ve always thought that, “Why do I find it hard to write the next line” was a superb lyrical cop-out by Spandau Ballet
    But the award for me must go to a band that formed from the remnants of Duran Duran (I forget their name) and spawned this lyrical gumph:
    “I do this and I do that
    and when it’s cold I wear a hat
    It pays to advertise they say
    I’ll keep my hat on anyway!”

  3. Do you think she got lots of dirt in her hair??
    And from my teenage years – the genius that was Roxette started one of their songs..
    ” Hi! I got to go, get aboard a love jet heaven and back my-my-my-my-my-my-my”
    Well – their first language wasn’t English!
    Oh how about “I put horses heads in people’s beds” (Catatonia)

  4. Roger Taylor, the drummer for Queen had some classic lyrics on his solo albums.
    One of his songs starts with “I went to the Ukraine, they don’t have much to e-eat. No sugar on the table, but the people stay swe-eet”.

  5. How about *all* the lyrics to Black Betty by Ram Jam?! My Neighbourhood by Space is well worth a look too (
    Moving to something slightly more modern, the current track by Kanye West includes the line “I ain’t saying she’s a gold-digger, but she ain’t hitting on no broke [insert word that rhymes!]”.
    And of course, we can’t compile a list like this without making mention of Queen (“fat-bottomed girls you make the rocking world go round”).

  6. Perhaps Katie Melua herself should appear in this compilation with the lyrics – and indeed title! – to her track Penguins and Cats in which she sings:
    “And I’m divided between penguins and cats,
    but its not about what animal you’ve got,
    its about being able to fly”

  7. Personally my favourite in terms of wierd opening lines is Ten Shekel Shirt’s Cheer Up:
    ‘Cheer up, you are worse off than you figure’
    It turns out to be an amazing song about grace and how we are loved anyway.
    Not particularly bad, just kinda wierd.

  8. Ian, it was The Power Station that did the “I do this and I do that” lyric and the rest of the album was about as good. Surprised no-one has mentioned theworst lyric in the world from “MacArthur PArk” once sung by Frank Sinatra :
    MacArthur Park is melting in the dark, all the sweet, green icing flowing down.
    Someone left the cake out in the rain,
    I don’t think I could take it, `cause it took so long to bake it,
    And I’ll never have that recipe again, oh no!
    Delia Smith in verse !

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